Let's go for it.
What's going on? That is the oddest...
That was a six-way crossing with no hint at how to cross.
It was, "I'm the guv'nor." "Don't be an amber gambler."
- Who says that? - That was a traffic safety thing.
- Don't be an amber gambler...
be a green...runner bean
or a red communist sympathiser.
Hello, sorry.
Can I see your licence? I'm English.
I'm playing at the Henry Fonda Theatre.
My name's Eddie Izzard. I'm a stand-up comedian.
I've been touring the world since October.
I'm quite tired.
I'm just gonna give you a warning
but you need to carry some kind of identification.
You need a picture because this could be anybody's.
- I understand. - Get picture ID when you drive.
Your English licence here is fine. or an international one.
Make sure you get your seat belts on for your own safety.
L think I played the English polite...
and erm... "Anything you want.
"Yes, sir. No, sir. Three bags full, sir."
Seemed the best one as I have to be back in ten minutes.
Can I do...?
Is it all right for me to do a U-turn here? Is that a problem?
- No, go ahead. - OK, thank you.
- Don't crash. - No, I won't.
Thought I'd better ask that or he'd go.
"Now you've broken six laws in seven states.
"You're a murderer to boot.
"That's third time unlucky. you get thrown in for life."
I was a fucking smoothie.
That's it, you know.
I've been touring with Eddie probably nearly five years now.
'Erm, it's the third time we've been to the States.
'so we knew it would work but we thought it would be a slow build.
'We didn't expect what we got.
'which was a phenomenal reaction. just America gone crazy.‘
And what made me realise how big it had got.
we did a national radio programme. I think it was Philadelphia.
I was sitting in there with Eddie
and I was watching the screen come up with all the phone calls.
They have a map of America
and as the calls came through. the screen lights up.
So he was getting Georgia, South Carolina.
Nashville, Tennessee, New York City.
Boston, you know. Chicago...
So all these phone calls were coming in from all over the States
and you think, "How the hell do all these people know about it?
"We haven't been to these places." and of course it's the power of HBO.
We're on our way upstairs now.
So erm...it's been a hell of a ride, this one.
It's amazing, I originally came for one week only to do Eddie's make-up
and then, how many, six months on...?
I'm on my way to the laundry to do a little show washing
and a few personal bits.
My job title was make-up artist. then a natural progression happened.
an assistant and then personal training came in
and you sort of do the massage as well...
Suddenly all these things.
all the skills We spent years learning to do.
I've used in one job.
It's great, it's been a challenge and no two days are the same.
I don't like to affect the stage in any way
but I like the stage to look very clean and look sexy.
'It's never about the lights. it's never about the set.
'it's always about him. His performance carries the show.'
We move through a spectrum of colours
so that you're watching and it's blue
and ten minutes later you realise the stage is lavender now
and feels different.
So that as the stories build and the laughter's building.
the look of the stage goes through a linear progression as well.
We've got all the tapes. we've got the spiel.
- now we're ready for new material. - We're waiting for Circle.
He's great! I like the fact that he brings in historical concepts.
it's more of an intellectual comedy.
He may not dress like the guy next door unless you live here but...
But that's not even an issue. that's the best part about it.
His dress and that. you get by it in seconds.
I feel that his shtick.
which is the whole outfit and all. wears away in comparison to...
- the intellectual side. - The humour's excellent.
- Your first impression? - Blew me away. He's my new fave.
The issues that he talks about aren't negative
and just slamming people in a way to get easy jokes.
It's very well thought out material. Brilliant writer.
Third night at LA.
Brad Pitt. Jennifer Aniston. Elvis Costello.
people killing themselves for tickets.
Typical day of the tour.
- Stand by. - I'm on. Bye-bye.
'Lift-off. We have lift-off.'
I've got one of Eddie's "for your Emmy consideration" video tapes.
I heard you talking to them. I didn't know who Eddie Izzard was.
I put one on eBay and it went through the roof.
If I get this signed, this'll be the first signed Emmy tape ever on eBay.
There is a hustle element to it but like I said...
I'm not ashamed of you. Get it out there, boy.
These women love him and there might be a woman in New Jersey
who would love a signed copy of this tape.
So I hope, morally. that I'm performing a service.
Thanks, man.
So beautiful...
In future years, I'll do the whole thing in Spanish.
- Don't stop coming back. - No. I'll come back.
My teenagers are so glad to see you. They wait and wait to see your show.
Thank you for coming.
What is this?
It's your "for your consideration" video sent out to Emmy members.
eBay. $300.
Well, If they're gonna be sold... We've worked for days...
I just wanna say that one's for my collection and one I'd put on eBay
but if you tell me not to. I won't do it.
But one is for me.
I'll sign one of them. OK?
You have my word, man. I won't put it on.
Can you sign it up here so it's visible?
One more picture?
- If you do it very quickly. - OK.
But those people there. they seem fine.
Erm. I think it's only...
Then you get a certain amount of people who are...
definitely...definitely, ah....
What's the word? They need to get a life.
If they've got a life and they think. "Hey, we saw a show." it's great
but if something becomes their life.
they want to see the show backwards and forwards, that's no good.
'It's a weird one now because he is known.
'A group of people here don't know him and want to kill him
'and a group here want his autograph. sometimes at the same time.'
I'm watching it and I know he is too
but he has this look which is straight ahead.
whereas my look is to the side
cos I'm trying to see who's clocked him and what their intention is
and he doesn't give a shit.
'If they want his autograph. they'll get it.
'If they want to have a go at him. he'll have a go back.'
I can't pretend to know what he feels
but I know that my feeling is one of wanting to protect him.
There was only one girl. in Australia.
who did do the hostile sort of thing.
We'd just finished a show. going for a drink afterwards
and this one girl outside said. "Are you wearing lipstick?"
Eddie's like, "Yeah," and she called him a fucking freak
and Eddie came back with a very good comeback
and went in and it was over and done with.
'But I stayed outside because I got really offended.
'l was like, "That's my friend you've just been very rude to."
'and was in fighting mode and then went, "No, gotta be professional.'"
Eddie then went inside and was like. "Where's Helen?
"Oh, my God! She's gonna be outside duffing that girl up.
"Someone go and grab her now."
- Start. - Well. Mr Big Camera.
We got loads of stuff. It was just given to us from MAC.
I used to steal this. I got done... They didn't put me in prison
but I stole about that much.
I had it in a loaf of bread.
And look! We got two bags just given.
The only thing is we have to wear it all
and that's illegal in some countries.
C-R... l-N-A...
Norbert. N-O...
So now I would imagine that I've done
about 200 or 250 performances with Eddie
and we've just about run the gamut
of things that could go wrong during his performances.
There was earlier versions underneath.
The Mona Lisa was the last one but the first was much more...
Definitely had other sound problems
but nothing on the scale of what happened tonight
in a 1.500 seat venue with basically the sound crackling along.
And the one thing that makes Eddie so amazing as a performer is
nothing quite seems to faze him when these things happen
and I'm not so sure he doesn't do things on purpose
because he seems to enjoy it so much on stage when things screw up.
Then there was Sexy Lisa.
Then there's Mona Lisa. "I don't wanna be here.
"I'm fucking fed up with this."
- Yes.
There we go.
- Oh. I'm sorry.
Say again?
A little technical thing.
Are your batteries down or something?
Cordless... Are we gonna mend it?
- What about that one?
- Is it completely fucked?
All right, we got...
Test, test, one, two, three...
- Test, one, two, three, one, two.
No, no.
You've just come on full stream. No, I haven't done anything.
- No, you fuck off.
Ohh, that's not so good. we're all going through that.
That one right there is bad.
That was just there? And that one. And that one.
And that one. All the front ones.
Just sit there with your fingers in your ears.
God, what a fucking Saturday night out.
If it's... I can't really continue... Daniel, this could happen again?
Nod your head if it could. I'm going to go onto my own lungs.
They do... I have to speak from the diaphragm now.
Thank God I did a bit of diaphragm training.
Right, this is going to be slightly different...
What's going on?
I've gone into opera singer mode.
Great.
It's the speakers.
- We'll have a little intermission.
If everyone comes back in about 20 minutes.
we'll try and sort this shit out and get it back on the road.
'The audience were fantastic.
'they went with it and Eddie carried on.'
But backstage was everyone going. "What's going on?"
What's the situation? Cos people actually left...
Can you give me some gauge on that in terms of numbers?
Are you still rolling?
So Eddie will go back out. they'll drift back in, correct?
I'm trying to gauge it from this end.
I'm gonna go back there. I'll call them back in. I'll talk to them.
Let's just get a time from Ed now.
Test, test, one, two. three, four, five...
'He came off, there was no "What the hell's going on?"
'He was just calm.
"'OK, can we get it together? How long is it gonna be?"
'That's how he was the whole time.'
- Go now. - Have a good show.
So... So...shaIl we rock'n'roll this?
All right, as I was saying...
"When do we want it?" "Now. motherfucker."
You missed such a good thing! It should have been on camera.
The whole sound went out.
And really big time!
Did you enjoy it. in a strange sort of way?
- Yeah. they were very good. - Lucky for the street performing.
- It's such a difficult room... - I was doing diaphragm stuff.
People were listening. I could still see them laughing
but people at the back would have had a problem
but nobody left.
It was piercing. The people at the front were having a bad time.
it was feeding back, really shrill.
Normally if you go onto the cord microphone.
the microphone with the lead. it should be fine
but that was feeding back.
Then I thought. "I'll just shout the rest of this."
and that was what I did at the Comedy Store.
back in 1990. ten years ago this very day.
And someone shouted, "Interval!"
and we'd already talked about if it fucks up we can do an interval.
It was still feeding back when I talked verbally.
Well done, Eddie. thanks for sticking with it.
That's all right. Thanks for sorting it out. Are you OK?
- Just embarrassed. - Next time, we take a sound guy.
Every cable, every speaker. every amplifier, everything.
- throw it all out and start over. - I like that.
This one could be... What are you doing?
It was exactly what I felt like doing so...
He just went to swig it from the bottle.
Mick was under a lot of strain.
One of the most amazing things he ever did
was when the sound screwed up
and he went out to the audience. thanked them for being there.
'He went out, signed autographs and took pictures for an hour.
'His reasoning was they were there for him
'so he would be there for them.'
So welcome to Transvestites Over Broadway.
Up here, further up the road. there's Broadway.
the theatre district of New York.
here does many things...
but they've never had many transvestites flying over Broadway.
Sort of made deaf in one ear.
I saw a specialist and he told me. "Yep, you're deaf in one ear."
So it was. "That's great!" And nothing can be done about that.
I've seen people for my back.
Orthopaedic surgeons and chiropractors and whatever.
Had a nice bout of food poisoning
and saw a couple of doctors for that.
If people come back in space bubbles and measure things.
they will find out a lot of people in the RAF, not the RAF per se but...
They do sort of action stuff. I was thinking of being in the army...
Everybody was blown away with how successful it was overall.
And it's all down to Eddie
but it's amazing to be a part of the thing that...
We started out so small
and it's just kind of mushroom clouding into bigger things.
And... "Good afternoon, sir. We're going to invade...
"Are we going to invade anyone today?"
"No, Simmons. we're at peace with everyone."
"Really? Oh, dash it. I was hoping to murder some people today."
Yeah.
Well, I've got a couple of... small children
who don't believe they have a father any more
and a wife who doesn't believe she has a husband.
so I need to go and...
sacrifice myself on the altar of fatherdom and husbandry...
Husbandry? That's something else, I think.
They're not adjustable...
just like most people's breasts. you can't adjust them
unless you've attached a bicycle pump to the nipple
and you have a catheter put in
and then you can pump up your breasts to enormous sizes
and impress your friends.
Very good at parties. "Afternoon. I have large breasts."
"So you do, sir. Do you blow them up with a bicycle pump?"
"Every other day. Some days I come out with one large and one small."
"And what is the reaction?" "Not too good.
"I tend to get attacked by...
"by...half of Wisteriastan."
"You get attacked by half of Wisteriastan?"
"No...
"No, sir, I was lying. Well, I get attacked by the local gentry."
The first time I laid my eyes on Eddie was on video
because I never saw him at P.S.122.
And, erm...
My fear with Eddie was that his humour wouldn't be relevant
and wouldn't be relevant to the American audience.
And I remember one thing he did.
I think it was about melons in a supermarket.
So, I'd like you to. on behalf of the Liberal Party.
I'd like you to vote...for me in the next general election.
I'll be standing in many different seats around Britain.
'And, er... If I am down your way and knock on your door.
'and you come to the door and shoot me. I'll be awfully upset.'
'We see the earth now. Roger.
'The Eagle has landed.'